Amber & Dean

Amber’s parents and four siblings (two brothers and two sisters) live in Connecticut and Rhode Island, about two hours away from our house. We are close with them and make sure we video chat with them weekly. Amber has two nephews and two nieces whom we see monthly. Either we drive to visit them or they come to see us, sometimes for a day trip or a long weekend. Amber’s brother-in-law was born in Jamaica and moved to the states when he was young. The relationship between Amber’s sister and brother-in-law has been a firsthand experience for how to raise biracial children in a transracial family. It also provides Bryce with a positive exposure to other cultures and nationalities. Dean’s parents and two brothers are about a 20-minute drive away from our house. He has two nephews with whom Bryce enjoys playing basketball, football, and Hot Wheels racecars with. We’re able to spend time with his family several times a month. We’re able to swim in Dean’s parents’ pool in the summer months, play in the backyard, and pick vegetables from their garden. He also has family members in New Hampshire and Florida whom we visit a few times a year.  Both families are very supportive of our parenting journey and our plans for adoption. Everyone is excited to expand the family and share their love. 

• Comedy movies like Step Brothers and Anchorman • Doing jigsaw puzzles and puzzle games like Sudoku • Disney movies…I’m a sucker for Encanto, Coco, and Moana • Running marathons…I’ve currently completed 9 marathons • The sun and warm weather, summer is my favorite season • Singing around the house, even though I have a terrible singing voice

Dean is a loving, supportive dad and is a role model for Bryce every day. He encourages Bryce when he’s learning a new skill, such as climbing a rock wall or putting together a puzzle. Some things Dean loves to do with Bryce are to give airplane rides through the house, sing along and dance to children’s songs, teach him how to play sports, make fruit smoothies together, and snuggle up to read a book.  Being an engineer, Dean teaches Bryce problem-solving skills, fun math games, and demonstrates a growth mindset during play for Bryce to learn from. Dean is always learning new things by listening to informative podcasts, reading, and researching topics. He’s always trying to think about things differently from other people’s perspectives, and challenge people’s biases. He’s a great listener and enjoys letting others lead the conversation. I’d describe Dean’s love language as time and service, because he believes in spending time with others and helping in any way he can, whether that be a house project or sharing a book recommendation. Dean is a present father while also working full-time to support our family. He brings laughter and joy to our home. I’m so lucky to parent alongside Dean. 

• Baking (favorites are zucchini brownies and sweet potato chocolate chip cookies) • Cooking (favorites are peanut rice noodle stir fry and three bean cocoa chili) • Dumbbell workouts or runs through our neighborhood with Bryce in the jogger stroller  • Reading memoirs or fiction books. I read around 40 books a year!  • Yardwork during every season of the year; planting our vegetable garden, mowing, raking leaves, or shoveling snow • Sitting on the beach at the ocean and listening to the waves.

Amber is the oldest of five children, and she served as a motherly role to help raise her four siblings. As she grew up, her drive to raise and nurture others led her to education. After getting her master’s in teaching, she joined Teach for America and taught in an urban school in Mississippi. She went on to be a founding teacher for a school in RI, and after that, was offered a job to teach at a highly sought-after upper-class school in NY. She turned it down because she didn’t feel she could make the biggest impact in a school of privileged kids with wealthy parents. Instead, she started teaching at an inner-city school in NY and loved it. After teaching for many years, she shifted all her energy from being a teacher to being a parent. We had many discussions about how we wanted to raise our children. Ultimately, we decided to make personal sacrifices so that Amber could take time away from her career to stay home with our children, and I would get a job that allowed me to work remotely so that we could spend as much time together as a family as we could. With all that being said, the most important thing to Amber is being a mother and caring for others. She is a mother down to her core, even before she was an actual mother. She’s patient, caring, protective, and provides unconditional love to myself and Bryce. I have no doubt that she will show that same unconditional love to our future child. I am incredibly lucky to have her as my partner and the mother of my children, and I am proud of who she has become.